This note is dedicated to any and all of you who strive for something better in this world. Whether this something be personal, family related or global, I appreciate that there are people like you out there who dare to improve. In my set of beliefs you are free to come and go as you please but every action has a consequence. Actions toward betterment of any cause grounded in love will bare positive consequences we all will feel. A better you means better people around you. No bad can come from that. “As we let our light shine we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our fears our presence automatically liberates others.”

 Let me preface by saying I believe life is indeed a path or journey with a destination we have chosen for ourselves with many tasks all set to bring balance to yourself, those around you and the earth itself. With that being said I also believe that NOTHING happens without reason. There is a purpose in all things and lessons within every so called “coincidence.” I also believe in a higher power, that all roads lead to the heaven we create for ourselves and that man condemns, not God. Please don’t let my belief system deter you from reading further. I believe what you do as well, that you ABSOLUTELY deserve the best no matter the circumstances and that you ARE worthy of all forms of love. With this common belief in mind it is my hope that you find something in these experiences I commit to this note.

A few days ago I put the finishing touches on closure to a chapter in my life that has weighed me down for nearly a decade. As such, a certain peace has come over me. With this peace came affirmation of one of my truths in this world. I was going through what I believed to be a period in my life where I would suffer some to learn a few hard lessons and carry them with me to better life around me. Although going through anything like this is a drag(which I am sure a lot of you can relate) I am grateful to be better for it. We must not let what we percieve to be a negative experience be past off as bad luck. Learn from it and grow! These are the most important lessons in life and can often be the game changers for all of us. What you learn from a bad relationship could change every relationship around you for the better forever. What you have stolen from you now could show you and the people around you how to protect more important things later. Let inspiration take over when the lesson is done and be ready for a change of heart. A decade filled with ups and downs from this one thing and the compiled lessons from other angles in my life showed me much to be thankful for when happiness does show it’s face.

I suppose I am writing this as a thank you to all who can relate and to those who cannot now but will when the timing is right. I will leave you with this thought:

I still resonate most closely with William Wordsworth’s way of describing God in “Tintern Abbey”: “A sense sublime of something far more deeply inter-fused, whose dwelling is the light of setting suns, the round Oceans, the living air, the blue sky and in the heart & mind of man. It is a motion and a spirit that impels all thinking things, all objects of thought and thought forms and rolls through all things.”

It is with this in mind I remind you to be not judging, condemning or absent. Just be accepting in the confidence that you are perfect in your own right and that through love we can all strive together to live harmoniously no matter what our belief systems are. This is the essence of humanity. We all want something better. Why not work together for it?

Maybe I’m not the best guy to take dating advice from. I have been told I am a good boyfriend but haven’t been in a serious relationship in God knows how long. I do date pretty regularly but have a difficult time saying yes to anything long-term. Some women I date are amazing people and would probably make outstanding girlfriends. I just feel that I have a lot going on in my life and a relationship would complicate things tremendously. That being said here’s How I believe a woman should handle a guy like me. We all know there are a ton of us out there.

1. Be honest and up front with yourself about what you are looking for in a relationship. If a boy says something like, “I just really enjoy dating.” or, “I would make a terrible boyfriend right now.” No matter how much you like him, if you are looking for a boyfriend, this is definitely not the guy. He’s making an attempt to tell you he likes you a lot but doesn’t want to be exclusive.

2. Using sex to get close to a guy like me isn’t smart. Sex is a gift and not a bartering tool. Don’t try to negotiate your way into his life by using sex. The whole “maybe if I sleep with him he’ll get the point” thing never works. If you can’t get as close to him as you need to bewithout sex he doesn’t deserve the happy satisfaction of  the proverbial “happy ending.” I say” happy ending” because if you use it for the wrong reasons that’s exactly the result you’ll get.

3. Guys like us have a place in most single women’s life. Make sure you’re as honest about that spot as we are.

I hope I helped a little. Sometimes I am not as honest with myself about how I feel in my relationships and was hoping maybe if I share it with the world it’ll help me sort out some of it. Happy hunting my friends.

It is my humble (and accurate) opinion that if you are mad at the world, bitter, or just full of hate you have three options:

1. Turn it into kick ass comedy and make a contribution to society.

2. Change your outlook/attitude on life.

3. Suck it up and Shut your mouth!

It’s your fault life isn’t working out the way you want it to. I can say this because every proactive person I know is both happy, and they have achieved some measure of success in life. Bad things happen to good people, we all make mistakes and messes. This being said, if your way of handling the lemons life hands you is to cut ‘em in half and suck one down while simultaneously smashing the other half in some one’s face you should probably grow up some and learn to have some fun.

The real fact of the matter is there are some catastrophic things that will happen in your life that you will have zero control over in any way, shape or form. Complaining makes you feel better about it. Complaining is totally OK (I’m complaining right now.) Harboring a ridiculous amount of anger and taking it out on everyone or harboring tons of bitterness and just gossiping horrible things behind some one’s back is ridiculous.

Just learn to laugh off the inevitable and clean up the messes. Move forward and be nice. I know it’s fair to say that if you are bitter you aren’t making life any easier on yourself and you are destroying any chance of growing your social circle because grumpy people suck!

This blog post just made me a social genius. You’re welcome society

 

Today I will write about yesterday. When I say yesterday I mean no subject at all. That just sounded like a really swell way to get your attention.

PAST:

I have realized that when I was younger I lived a relatively unhappy life. On the outside I looked like a fun, content, well rounded boy. On the inside I was a fucking mess. Always wondering what I should do next, Where I should go, what will happen to me, etc. I dated fun, sweet, nice girls. I played sports (and was good at it.) I even went on trips and shit while all the while being filled with questions about who I am and where I was going. I made some enemies because I lied. I lied because I had no clue what the truth is (in a literal and metaphorical since.) And made enemies out of people I would have really liked to stay friends with.

PRESENT:

Today I don’t lie. Period. I realized that lurking inside of me (and most people) is a person that would do things that most people aren’t proud of. I decided that instead of lying to myself and everyone and trying to make them believe I was a good person I was just gonna be who I am, faults and all. I made up my mind that if you don’t like me you can go fuck yourself and leave me alone. It’s better that we don’t get to involved because then we will end up lying to each other to make one another like each other (does that make fucking since at all) and then the truth will come out and we will inevitably hate one another or fight.

I do great things now honestly. I back the Bloggess Army (if you don’t know what it is read my other blog posts.) I donate to charity, have amazing friends, date cool girls, and heathenize with minimum guilt. It’s a great life.

MORAL OF THE STORY:

Just be honest.

Thank you for reading and have an honest day (faults and all.)

So for my first post on my WordPress blog (which I will likely neglect as much as my blogspot blog) I’ll let you in on a few social dynamics tips:

1. Getting out of the house is the first step in creating a social life. 

I know it’s a hard pill to swallow but most of the time the fun WILL NOT come to you. I also know that leaving the comfort of your World of Warcraft Universe might piss off your guild or clan or whatever but the game is doing nothing for you in real life and ruining any chance you might have of meeting anyone let alone getting lucky. This makes your confidence go to shit and thereby perpetuates the vicious cycle.

Parents, if you are sheltering your children here is another problem. Parents run this guilt trip on kids to keep ‘em in check sometimes. Make them feel guilty about going out and doing what kids do and they won’t for fear of disappointing you. Well, it does something else to them. It makes them resent you and doesn’t allow them the social development or to gain the status in their group of friends that they have a right to get a chance at. Yes parents, status is important in teenaged life as well! Lighten up assholes! You want your children to grow up as undeveloped and awkward weirdos? You want your son to be the guy in the office no one can talk to? Do you want your daughters dreams of being an actress or doctor dashed because she just can’t speak in front of people? Then fucking get over yourself and let go!!!

2.The Approach

Being in an environment where you can meet new people and experience new things creates new experiences you can talk about. A large percentage of people have a strange fear about running out of things to say (material) and therefore never approach to make a new friend. Well I can help there as well. There is an acronym that approach artists and sales people use to guide a conversation so that you don’t run out of steam: FORM

Family: Where are you originally from? Do you have Kids? etc.

Occupation: Well…

Recreation: What do you do for fun?

Message: After a solid 10-20 minutes of conversation you get to the point of the approach. This is really where the magic happens. You have already established a connection or a certain comfort level with whoever you’ve approached and can now either walk away with a simple nice meeting you(if that was your objective) or begin to get to the point.

This tactic is only reserved for the new folks because after using it awhile you’ll see that sometimes it feels more like an interview and you come off disingenuous. The idea is to get you into the game and talking to new people. Also it will help you figure out your sticking points and help you hammer them out. After awhile you’ll feel at home opening up to people and an aura will form about you that screams, “COME AND MEET ME!” I left alot of little, important details out and if I get enough feedback about it I will dive into the specifics at a later date.

3.Closing

To close a conversation is quite simple friends. It was nice to meet you, I really enjoy talking to you but…

Boys and girls if you are trying to meet a new potential interest: This conversation is really good but I have to get back to (insert whatever it was you were doing before you approached here) how do we continue this at a later date? Usually the phone number/email will come out. As a rule of thumb I usually don’t offer mine for the simple fact that asking for it denotes courage and confidence. Also offering yours has the adverse effect. Girls, this is a FANTASTIC filter for boys. If a guy can’t ask he really doesn’t deserve you. Although if you really just can’t let him slip away there are exception to every social rule (except psychotic behavior. Eating your own poop is generally always a deal breaker.) Guys should be willing to risk a little embarrassment for the potentially HUGE payoff of meeting someone special.

I’ll end it there for now. My hope is I helped someone and pissed the rest of you off. You’re welcome.